How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
