Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
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