people are starting to question the shark bite story
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
i dont even know how to be here
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
