whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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