i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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