He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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