I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
