You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
