remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
