There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
