I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
