and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
