Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
