this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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