It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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