What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
