Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
