Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
