I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
