More tranny stories later!
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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