dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
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