We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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