Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
