I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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