yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
