you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
