i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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