your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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