just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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