I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
