so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I will be naked everywhere
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
