It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Randomize
