My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Randomize
