"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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