my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
