I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Rumble strips road head = magical
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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