JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
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