Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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