She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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