best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Randomize
