just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I FOUND THE LEGS
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
