You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
