That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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