Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
