508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
