she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
