I got chris browned last night
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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