is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
