Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
