what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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